How to Have True Love and Holiness in Marriage

image 4

Mid-Week Sermon Recap

Pastor Jim is focusing on marriage in this week’s message and there is a lot of scripture to help guide us through this popular topic. We’ll focus on the themes of true love and holiness within marriage as written in Ephesians 5:22-33. This passage provides us with profound insights into the roles and responsibilities of husbands and wives, emphasizing the importance of love, submission, and holiness. Let’s dive into this topic and explore what it means to live out these principles in our marriage.

Focus Scripture: Ephesians 5:22-33 (ESV)

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.”

Breaking It Down:

  1. Understanding Submission and Love
  2. The Call to Holiness
  3. Practical Steps

1. Understanding Submission and Love:

Wives, Submit to Your Husbands

Is this verse still relevant in a modern world? First the answer is God’s design is perfect and unchanging, so yes! Unfortunately, it is also one of the most misunderstood concepts. The concept of submission can be challenging to understand and accept, especially in today’s culture where self-centeredness is common. However, it’s crucial to recognize that biblical submission is not about inferiority or blind obedience. Instead, it is about mutual respect and support within the marriage relationship. Working as a team. The Greek word for “submit” (hupotasso) is a military term that means to “stand and support in the ranks.” It implies a sense of order and structure, not domination or control.

Husbands, Love Your Wives

Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church. This is a high and sacrificial calling. Christ’s love for the church was selfless, unconditional, and sacrificial. He gave Himself up for the church to make her holy and blameless. Husbands are to emulate this kind of love, putting their wives’ needs above their own and nurturing them with care and respect.

2. The Call to Holiness:

True Love Sets Us Apart

True love, as described in Ephesians 5, sets us apart and makes us holy. Holiness means being separated and untouched by evil. It is not merely some lovely, unattainable concept; it is about being a Christian who desires to reflect God’s character. To be holy is to be “set apart” for God’s purposes, living a life that is free from the corruption of sin and asking for forgiveness when it’s needed.

Living a New Way of Life

To live a holy life, we must give up the old way of life and embrace the new way of life in Christ. This involves a transformation of our thoughts, actions, and attitudes. We are called to put off the old self, which is corrupted by deceitful desires, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22-24). We are to grow in holiness throughout our life.

3. Practicing This in Real Life:

For Husbands

  • Love Sacrificially: Reflect on how Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her. Consider ways you can sacrificially love your wife, putting her needs above your own.
  • Nurture and Cherish: Just as you care for your own body, take time to nurture and cherish your wife. This includes emotional, spiritual, and physical care.
  • Lead with Humility: Leadership in marriage is never about control, but about serving and guiding with humility and love.

For Wives

  • Support and Respect: Understand that submission is about supporting and respecting your husband. It is about working together as a team, with each person fulfilling their God-given roles.
  • Encourage and Uplift: Be a source of encouragement and strength for your husband. Your respect and support can empower him to lead with love and integrity.
  • Seek Unity: Strive for unity in your marriage, recognizing that you and your husband are one flesh. Work together to build a strong and mutually loving relationship.

For Both Spouses

  • Pursue Holiness: Make holiness a priority in your marriage. This means avoiding anything that could corrupt or defile your relationship. Seek to honor God in all that you do.
  • Communicate Openly: Open and honest communication is essential for a healthy marriage. Share your thoughts, feelings, and concerns with each other, and be willing to listen and understand.
  • Pray Together: Make prayer a regular part of your marriage. Pray for each other, for your relationship, and for God’s guidance and wisdom.

Ideas to Think About

In conclusion, Ephesians 5:22-33 gives us a beautiful and challenging picture of marriage. It calls husbands to love their wives sacrificially and wives to support and respect their husbands. It also emphasizes the importance of holiness, urging us to live lives that are separated and untouched by evil. As we strive to live out God’s design in our marriages, we can experience the true love and unity that God intends for us!

Prayer For This Week

Heavenly Father, thank you for giving us wise and loving advice for healthy marriages. We ask for strength and wisdom to fulfill our roles and to honor You with our relationship. We may stumble from time to time as we grow, but You are there to forgive and to help us. Let our relationship be a reflection of Your love for us and an example to others. In Jesus name, Amen.


Lakeview Christian Church of Portage Lakes invites you to join us in this Sunday. Together, we can experience God’s Grace and share the love of Jesus with those around us.

Recent Sermons

Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

The Irony of Solomon’s Life

By Tricia Patton | July 12th, 2024
Posted in Quick Thought
Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

The Ultimate Treasure Hunt: Discovering Wisdom in Proverbs

By Tricia Patton | July 11th, 2024
Posted in Quick Thought
Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

The Power of Remembering Prayers

By Tricia Patton | July 10th, 2024
Posted in Mid Week Sermon
Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

Students Anchored in God: His Good Plans For Us

By Tricia Patton | July 9th, 2024
Posted in Quick Thought
Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

Youth and Their Exciting Role in God’s Kingdom

By Tricia Patton | July 8th, 2024
Posted in Quick Thought
Current Sermon Series: Proverbs - The Way of Wisdom

Wisdom: More Than Just Knowledge

By Tricia Patton | July 5th, 2024
Posted in Quick Thought